Thursday, June 8, 2017

Covfefe - A word malleable enough for all situations



On his campaign trail Trump had spoken highly of his education and his knowledge of words. In fact, when he was criticising President Obama he had said ‘I went to an Ivy league school, I am very highly educated. I know words, I have the best words…..’. He proved that when he forged ‘bigly’ and ‘unpresidented’. These words, and the many to come, though currently indecipherable may in the future be juxtaposed with his actions and thereby meaning be derived for both - word and deed.

Trumps 31st May early morning tweet introducing the world to his new word ‘covfefe’ left the world agog. Though the word uses English alphabets its etymology is for anyone to guess as is its meaning. This is a good thing, because the word is not beholden to any one language making it truly global. Further it allows one to work with the word to see what Trump-created-situations most befit its usage.

Trump made the term ‘you are fired’, used so brilliantly by him in ‘The Apprentice’ a household expression. This phrase exuded power and indicated who the boss and minion were. Therefore it would have come as no surprise if Trump thought he could use it during his tenure at the White House. However, this phrase has a very limiting jurisdiction and does not do justice to the vast powers that come with being the President of the United States of America. The word ‘covfefe’ may have many ways of pronunciation but it means just one thing and there are no two ways about that. It has the potential to not only describe a Trumpian world but also emotions raised by Trumps decisions. Though Trump introduced this word a bit late in the day it does help bigly.

Would ‘you are fired’ have made sense to the Native Americans whose lands, water and way of life are threatened by the Dakota Access Pipeline (DAPL) that Trump has okayed? Of course it wouldn’t because they are not Trump employees, they are American citizens. With the signing of Executive Orders that advanced the approval of the pipeline Trump has presidentially told these people ‘You Are Covfefed’. The use of ‘covfefe’ in such a expression makes utmost sense as it highlights their plight and predicament, this pipeline not only goes through their sacred grounds in complete disregard of their heritage but also endangers water bodies like Lake Oahe and the Missouri River.

This is just one example of the potential of ‘covfefe’, and was restricted to the United States of America.

Infact, ‘covfefe’ does justice to the dominion Trump has over the world. When he signed the Global Gag Rule which bans  his governments funding to international NGOs that offer abortions in other countries while also stopping the funding to the  United Nations Population Fund (UNFPA) which provides family-planning and reproductive-health services to women and girls in more than 150 countries he covfefed the lifes of millions. The impact of such a covfefed-up order was such that European countries came together to fill the atleast 600 million USD vacuum with a beginning of 32.5 million USD.

Trumps under the surface simmering desire to leave no stone unturned to covfefe-things-up has gone beyond boundaries, friends and foes. One  saw him curtsying to the King of Saudi Arabia and promising them a good deal on American weapons which meant he was going to covfefe American business. However, in this instance one needs to add to the current connotation of covfefe with ‘back-stabbing’. Trump intended to Make America Great Again by giving a bargain to the Saudis, who he has belaboured as being the fount of terrorism, at the cost of American business. How covfefed-up is that?

One will ignore Trumps lack of knowledge of geography so flagrantly displayed in his conversations in Israel and carry on to Europe. In Europe he not only made the US a pariah at the NATO summit but came up second best in the encounter with the French President Macron. It would be totally understandable if Trump was feeling covfefed after that bone crushing encounter.

But even after Trump retreated to his cave to lick his wounds post his first international tour he promised more. After introducing covfefe to the world he later tweeted on the same day “I will be announcing my decision on Paris Accord, Thursday at 3:00 P.M. The White House Rose Garden. MAKE AMERICA GREAT AGAIN!” then on the 1st of June he posted ‘Join me live at the @WhiteHouse’ after his “We’re getting out” speech he tweeted ‘My job as President is to do everything within my power to give America a level playing field. #Americafirstus’. This was the cherry on the bringing-back-coal cake. With these decisions he has surpassed the human powers of the American President by not only covfefing this generation but the generations to come. His power is so ‘unpresidented’ that without pressing the Red Button (not to order a coke but a nuclear strike) he has covfefed the planet.

President Trump has had the opportunity to fire his National Security Adviser General Michael Flynn and the FBI Director James Comey. I am not sure whether Trump used ‘you are fired’ to show them the door. But I bet atleast one of them is now fantasising about his deposition at the Congressional hearings and how covffed Trump will be after that.  

2 comments:

Unknown said...

Another great piece by you, Samir.

Unknown said...

A great analysis of the situation, a la Trump. Great piece